5-Minute Friday [lonely]

Deerfield Beach

Got five minutes? Let’s write. Let’s finger paint with words. Let’s just write and not worry if it’s just right or not. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word. – Lisa-Jo BakerGO!

Sitting in our quiet home, alone but not lonely. Not today. Not most days. But I know lonely.

Being the new girl in school throughout most of my life, that’s lonely. Being the new girl anywhere is lonely.

I’ve sat in conferences surrounded by thousands and felt that feeling. Alone and unknown.

It doesn’t sound Christian-like to say I’m lonely when I believe in a God who is always with me. It’s not him, but me, who distances myself from acceptance and being, feeling, part of.

Our writing class leader started a prayer thread on our group page and I heard voices of the lonely. Lonely calling out, how long God? How much more? Because we all want to know that belonging. To me, belonging feels like everything is alright and that’s just not true. Not real.

It’s up to me, whether I feel lonely or not. Whether I choose to allow others into my life, to my heart. I am surrounded by people who care and today I am letting them in. Today it’s better than being that lonely girl I was.

7 thoughts on “5-Minute Friday [lonely]

  1. talesofapeanut says:

    Glad that the post before me dealt with kind of what I wrote about! It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who feels lonely.

    The line “It’s up to me, whether I feel lonely or not.” is so true and is so hard to read. Thanks for reminding me.

    Beautiful writing!

    • Debby says:

      Richelle, I’m glad you caught that. It just came out when I was writing and my mind caught onto it but with the 5 min. limit I didn’t have time to explore that. I know it’s true for me. I’m glad you stopped by too. You’ve given me more thought on exploring that. Actually, I’m attending the Catalyst conference in Oct, I’ve been going for several years, and this year’s theme is “Known”. Hmmmmm….

  2. Anita Ojeda says:

    I’m dropping in from Five-Minute Friday–your words “To me, belonging feels like everything is alright and that’s just not true. Not real.” struck a chord with me. Do we feel lonely and on the ‘outside’ because we’re afraid to belong? I’ve never thought of it like that before, but I’ve certainly felt lonely in crowds!

    • Debby says:

      Thanks for stopping by Anita. I need more thank 5 mon to explore some of what this brought to mind. So much about belonging and feelings of being known and alone. They seem to intertwined to me too. I’ll be in a place full of people this week. Maybe I should ask God to teach more on his belonging.

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